Helping A Friend Or Neighbor Cope With Loss

Before The Funeral

  1. Offer to notify his/her family and friends about funeral arrangements.
  2. House-sit to prevent burglaries during the funeral and visitations.
  3. Help answer phones and greet visitors.
  4. Keep a record of everyone who calls, visits or has been contacted.
  5. Help coordinate the food and drink supply.
  6. Offer to pick up friends and family at the airport and to arrange accommodations.
  7. Offer to provide transportation for out-of-town visitors.
  8. Help keep the house clean and the dishes washed.

After The Funeral

  1. Prepare or provide dinner on a day that is mutually acceptable.
  2. Do Step 1. every week for two to three months.
  3. Offer to help with the garden such as watering, mowing or pruning.
  4. Feed and exercise the pets, if any.
  5. Write notes offering encouragement and support.
  6. Offer to drive or accompany him/her to the cemetery regularly.
  7. Offer to house-sit so he/she can get away or visit family out of town.
  8. Make a weekly run to the supermarket, laundry, or cleaners.
  9. Help with the Thank You notes and/or other correspondence.
  10. Anticipate difficult periods such as anniversaries, birthdays, holidays and the day of death.
  11. Always mention the deceased by name and encourage reminiscing.

Above all, just listening and your concern and presence will help.